The Last Rite

June 8th, 2006

My father passed away on 5th June 2006 at 3.35 PM. I lost a person who was more of a friend to me than a dad. He was the only one with whom I shared everything. Everything = everything from studies to friends to girls to etc. etc. and yes he too was the same with me. He also openly discussed many issues that dads will find it difficult/impossible to discuss with their children. Natural disasters happen only for a few seconds and leave very little time for reaction. Nature
was (and is) a bit cruel on that part :((

Anyway, what has happened has happened and life has to continue. Therefore, in his memory and with his blessings, I will fulfill all his wishes and dreams. He made our life very comfortable. His planning was meticulous and we are always learning from him.

Three weeks before this shocking incident, I had this gut feeling that something bad was going to happen. On 24th June, the day of the last university exam, I was feeling sick. I wasn’t able to revise the subject properly and this guy was the only one to whom I let the feeling creep out. Without turning back, I made a dash to the bus after the exam got over. Only on seeing my dad at home, I felt relieved. Sometimes, at nights, I have even touched his chest to feel the heart beat. PHEW!!

Right now, I’m alright. I have let out all the feelings and ready to take on the responsibilities and the challenges. One main reason for that is, I felt the heart beat of my dad stop right under my palm. Thank God I didn’t cry at those very sensitive moments. My brother had good awareness to call 1066 (ambulance for emergency) immediately and telephone his friend and our cousin who were here within a few minutes. It is those few hours after death that matters when people are more important than anything else. The more people are near and the more the place of death is crowded, the more comfortable it is.

I want to describe those last few moments with dad, but it is difficult even to try and speak about it, leave alone write about it. I went to the bank today to deposit some money. My hands were shivering uncontrollably because where I saw my dad working a few days ago, that seat is empty now. That empty chair caused me to sweat. My cousin was with me and things eased out a little.

Tomorrow is the 5th day. The rituals are starting from tomorrow. Huge thanks to all the friends, relatives and unknown people who are supporting us.

Praying for the soul of my dad to rest in peace.

21 Responses to “The Last Rite”

  1. Santosh Jayamurugan Says:

    Sorry for wat has happened da…
    The loss is unconsolable and his visions now on ur shoulders to take responsibility…….Take life on its course da..

  2. Ramesh RV Says:

    My Deep condolences to your and your family. as santhosh said you have to take life as it comes.

  3. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @santosh, ramesh:

    yes…

  4. 3Signs Says:

    My Deep condolences Aswin..!

  5. rachel Says:

    >:D<….

  6. Yuvi Panda Says:

    :(( I am sorry I wasn’t able to msg you or phone you da. After Krish told me about this, something sorta happened to me, sorto like paralysed. All that I could do for 2 or 3 days was play games and sleep…. Maybe, it’s because 2 of my pretty close relatives are in hospital as well… I couldn’t think of it……

    I know how bad it is. I’ve been through it. Take your heart out, and as Santhosh said, take life as it comes, one day a time…..

  7. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @3signs:
    thanks

    @rachel:
    :-)

    @yuvi:
    yes… and plz take good care of yourself da..

  8. Srikanth Says:

    My Deep condolences Aswin..May god give u all strength to overcome the great loss..May his soul rest in peace

  9. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @srikanth:
    thanks buddy…

  10. sivakumar Says:

    i am sorry i couldnt be there with u da. i heard only today from krishna. i kind of feel if not understand ur situation as its just one year since my father had an attack. All losses are painful but i am sure u can recover from this as well. take care buddy.

  11. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @sivakumar:
    thanks da.. hoping the same

  12. Sudar Says:

    My deep condolences to you and your family da. Was kind of shocked after reading it.

    Hey this is the time in which you need to be strong and make others in ur family to recover.

    take care..

  13. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @sudar:
    sure… will take care :)

  14. vinu Says:

    I am sorry to know the incident Ashwin. I know its really difficult when such things happen suddenly to close people. People whom you love deeply and cherish.

    I am sure your dad will be around you giving you support when you need it. And I understand the comfort you get from your close ones in these time.

    Take care of yourself and other close ones in your family. Nice post . Will pray to god to give you strength.

  15. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @vinu:
    Thanks a lot vinu…

  16. unknown Says:

    Dear,
    Let ur father soul rest in peace….
    Hereafter u shud be very responsible….
    vazhkaiyin unmaiyana challenges ur going to face …

    Kavalaikal maranthu
    kanavil kuda ni santhoshamaka iruka naan iravanai prarthanai seikiren….

    take care my dear brother..
    am there for you whenever u need any help from my end…

  17. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @ammu:
    sure akka, thanks a lot :-)

  18. Sriram Says:

    felt very bad when bb told me… i couldn’t make it out to ur home as i had exams (one arrear) for me… my deepest condolences…… any help always ask me…

  19. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @sriram:
    no probs da

  20. smiley Says:

    My heart felt condolences. take care

  21. Aswin Anand T.H. Says:

    @smiley:
    thanks smiley